Getting Through Quitting Time
If you’re struggling with your New Year’s resolution, know that you’re not alone. Social scientists refer to the end of January as quitting time because it’s when people start dropping their resolutions.
So, here are three tips to get you back on track — and these are things that have worked for me and for people I have coached.
Tip #1 — First, focus on building the habit of just showing up and do it with a small version of what you’re trying to do.
If you’re trying to build a new habit, you could be setting yourself up for failure by starting too ambitiously.
Instead of jumping into working out for an hour a day or running three miles a day or completely revamping your diet, just start with showing up consistently with something small . . . and focus on the showing up part.
Start with five minutes of exercise or running around the block or swapping out one soda with a cup of tea -- and hold yourself to just that. And then, once you feel like that’s on auto pilot, build on it and expand it.
It can really help to think of this as two different habits and rather than trying to build both at the same time, first focus on just mastering showing up regularly.
Tip #2? Begin again! And here’s the important part – do it without judgment, without self-criticism, and without beating yourself up. Just begin again.
Maybe you got derailed yesterday. Maybe something unexpected came up or maybe you just weren’t feeling it. It doesn’t matter.
If you’re building a story around why you can’t or didn’t really want to anyway, just notice what you’re thinking - and set it aside.
Ups & downs are normal when you’re building new habits and working towards goals. But each day is a new day and today is the only day that matters. So, start over and begin again.
Tip #3 — Anchor the new habit you’re trying to build on something you already do consistently. Tie them together and let one trigger the other.
When I get up in the morning, I turn on the coffee pot and do eight minutes of stretching. Then I pour my coffee and sit and journal — and both of these are things I struggled with doing consistently until I anchored them to something I already do every day.
Want to start meditating regularly? I’ve coached others on tying it to making their bed or brushing their teeth. Want to be more consistent with affirmation or some prayer? Tie it to after your drop your kids off at school and you’re in the car by yourself. Want to start exercising more? Spend five minutes doing some body weight squats or wall push-ups or a walk around the block to when you log off from work ever day. That’s it!
If you feel like you just can’t get out of your own way with building habits and achieving goals and would like some help, I’m a coach and this is what I do! Shoot me a DM and let’s chat and see if I’m the right coach for you.